Synopsis:
Anna lives every day the best she can
while struggling against the demons that threaten to consume her and drag her
back into the darkness of her troubled past. The last thing she needs right now
is a guy, especially one as sweet and sexy as Jed.
When the attraction becomes too strong
to resist, she gives into it. Even when she knows it’ll only end in disaster
and leave her more her scared and broken than she was before.
Jed wants to find the right woman and
he’s drawn to Anna by carnal magnetism, but she also brings out an alpha side
of him that he’s never known. When his alpha rears its head, it triggers
memories in Anna and her carefully crafted wall of protection begins to show
cracks.
When fate and misunderstandings threaten
their already delicate relationship, can they survive? When Anna’s demons
threaten to be unearthed and Jed’s inner alpha only seem to make them worse,
can they overcome?
Is it even worth it?
Excerpt:
The Present: Jed’s POV
It’s Wednesday now, and
I’m watching something stupid on TV. Well, I’m not really paying attention to
the TV. My focus is on Anna who is curled up next to me, studying some papers.
It’s fascinating to watch her study. She chews on her thumb, tucks a pencil
behind her ear, and her beautiful blue eyes skim across the page. Every so
often, her eyes will narrow in concentration and she’ll pull the pencil out and
jot something down or underline something. Then she’ll twirl the end of the
pencil in between her plump, lush, pink lips. That’s when I redirect my
attention back to the TV, so I’m not tempted to rip the papers out of her hands
and replace the pencil with my tongue. I try to discretely adjust myself, and
try and fail to get the image of her lips wrapped around the pencil out of my
head, or around my cock… Shit!
When I glance back
down, she’s out and I inwardly chuckle. Here I am imagining my cock in her
mouth and she’s so tired, she passed out mid-study against me. I’m glad she’s
getting a little rest though, and I take the opportunity to drink her in. She’d
probably be embarrassed that I’m studying her right now. Her cheek is kind of
squished, and her mouth is parted a little more than normal, she’s beautiful. I
take my finger and gently, so I don’t wake her, trace the line of her jaw and
the curve of her nose. I run my finger along her eyebrows and my dick stirs
when my finger travels across those full pouty lips.
Her brow furrows and
she frowns, and my lips tip down too. Huh.
I wonder what she’s dreaming about.
Her body tenses into a
ridged plank and her face crumples. She looks like she’s in pain and maybe
embarrassed. Jesus, what the fuck?
“Um…Anna,” I whisper.
“Sthooooppp. Wahda ya
doin?” she sobs whispering.
What the hell needs to stop? What the hell is she
dreaming about? I’m starting to
panic. Should I try and wake her up? You’re not supposed to wake people up or
they’ll go on a murdering spree or something, right? Wait, no, that’s
sleepwalking. I should try and wake her.
“Anna,” I say a little
louder and give her shoulder a little shake.
Her face contorts in
agony and whispers, “Ged offa me.”
My stomach drops and my
jaw clenches. Get off of me? Christ,
I need to wake her up, get her out of whatever hell she’s in.
“Anna,” I say louder
and shake her shoulder a little harder.
“Pllleeeaassse sllopp,”
she whispers, and then starts to sob tearlessly and nearly silently.
Oh, fuck. I’m freaking
the fuck out because I’m almost positive she’s dreaming about rape or something
just as shitty. I want to jump in her head and bash the shit out of her dream
attacker. I feel helpless, and I hate it.
“Anna!” I yell and
shake her hard.
Her frantic eyes pop
open, and she sits up so fast that she almost knocks me off the couch, her wild
eyes searching the room.
“Are you okay, baby?” I
ask and I’m sure the horror and concern are all over my face.
She finally stops her
frantic searching and when her eyes meet mine, her face falls and ducks her
head, squeezing her eyes closed tighly. That’s the moment I know. I know this
wasn’t just a dream. It was a memory, and it was exactly what I thought it was.
I swallow thickly, and try not to show an ounce of my rising anger because I
don’t want to scare her. I need to comfort her and make sure she knows that
she’s safe.
“Hey,” I start softly.
“You’re okay, I’m right here.”
“I should go.”
Wait. What?!
“I have school in the
morning and you have work and it’s getting late, sorry I passed out,” she says
and lifts off the couch. She moves to the chair where her coat and school bag
are and starts shoving everything in.
It takes me a moment to
recover from the shock. This is not the reaction I was expecting.
“Don’t go right now.
Talk to me.” I stand up and approach her carefully.
She plasters a fake
smile on her face, but I can see the panic behind it. It’s rising, and I can
see her hands shake as she puts on her coat. Ah, shit. I’m trying to tamp down the urge to physically keep her
here, but I also can’t have her take off in the state she’s in right now.
She smiles a wobbly
smile, and I can see tears forming in her eyes. “Nothing to talk about, but I
should get going.”
I can’t let her run
from me. Not like this, not right now. “You’re staying. Talk to me.”
She clenches her jaw
and won’t look at me, but continues to put on her coat and gather her things.
“You talk in your
sleep.”
She freezes and turns
slowly to look at me. Her face is full of pain, embarrassment, and regret. She
opens her mouth to say something, but then quickly closes it and I see the
tears well up again. She swallows thickly and I can tell that she’s trying with
everything she has not to cry.
“Talk to me. What happened?”
She shakes her heads
with a tiny jerk. “I’ve got to go.” Before I can stop her, she flies out the
door.
Shit. I
throw on shoes, grab my keys, and rush out the door. She’s sprinting toward her
car, but I’m close behind her.
Fuck, it’s cold out here.
I forgot my jacket.
I reach her car a few
seconds after she closes the door, and I knock on the window.
Her head is buried in
her hands, and when she finally looks up at me, her face is tearstained. She
looks so tortured and the thought of something happening to her is tearing me
up. I’m fighting against my conflicting emotions—need to comfort her and rage
towards whoever did this to her.
I open the door and
kneel down in front of her. I reach out to wipe away a falling tear. “Let me
in.”
She squeezes her eyes
closed tight, and then gives a jerky shake of her head. “I can’t.”
I take her face in my
hands and lean in close. She needs to open up. I need her to open up. “Did someone hurt you?”
I can feel her jaw
clench under my hands. She looks scared and hurt, but I can also see the
shutters slam down like a steal door. “I’m sorry, Jed, but I need to go,” she
says in a quiet, even voice.
She reaches for the
door handle, but I grab her hand a little too hard. “You-” I start to say but
when her eyes widen in terror, the words die in my throat. I drop her hand
quickly and my mind starts spinning.
She shakes her head,
and her face turns blank. “I need to go.”
I’m so shocked that I
stand up and step back and she closes her door, starts the engine, and drives
off. The whole time I just stand and stare. I know it’s fucking freezing out
here, but I don’t feel a thing. As her taillights disappear, I come out of my
daze and I want to punch something. What
the fuck just happened? And why is this girl trying to drive out of my
life? I thought we were finally getting somewhere. She said on Saturday that
she’d open up to me one day, and tonight was a perfect opportunity. Instead,
she ran. I’m trying to understand that she’s scared and she panicked, but I’m
pissed that she wouldn’t unload on me when I’ve been telling and showing her
that I’m here for her, that she can come to me. God-fucking-dammit.
My patience is wearing thin. I know she
cares about me, and God help me, I’m not letting her go. She might be broken,
but I’ll help her put herself back together if it’s the last thing I do.
My Review: 5 stars
I don't even think I can put down how much this book affected me. Nicki did a fantastic job writing about difficult subjects that we all deal with in many ways. Whether it's large or small, we're all affected by these things. Anna has gone through so much in her life, and she's dealing with it, slowly but surely. Her ex was a complete jerk who just made her feel worthless and unloveable. Jed comes into Anna's life and wants to be there for her. Wants to be the one she turns to for anything. I loved that there was a happy ending for Anna, because she deserved it so much. It was amazing. I loved it, at times it was difficult to read, but so worthwhile. I'm not going to say much more than that, other than read this book. It will make you think about things, and feel so much.
Author Bio
Nicki DeStasi was raised in a small town
in Massachusetts. She attended Fitchburg State College and studied Early
Childhood Education. As a child, she enjoyed reading, but only recently began doing
it again. She has always had an inventive imagination and finally decided to
put those ideas on paper for others to enjoy. Worth It will be Nicki’s first self-published book. A few personal
facts: Sloth from The Goonies is her third cousin, she acted and stared in
several plays throughout high school and college, and she can play four
different instruments. Nicki’s philosophy is to appreciate the good things in
life. If we didn’t make mistakes and have bad things happen then we wouldn’t
know how truly wonderful the good things are. No matter how difficult life is
sometimes, if we look to the people that love us, then we can get through them
and on to the good stuff.
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